On a brighter note, I've finally finished all my prom shopping. Yesterday, that is on Saturday. On Friday i went out with friends, a bit of end of exam celebration and while waiting to be picked up from Pavilion, myself, Farisha and Moonia decided to look around the shops for prom shoes. Nose was alright, saw a pair of nice shoes but, they didn't really cut it. But oh boy, we walked into Charles and Keith, and i felt like I'd just walked right into heaven. I've always walked past the shop but i never actually walked into the shop, big mistake i tell you. The cute gay shop assistants and the shoes.. simply incredible. I sat and felt like a queen as i chose shoe after shoe and the sales assistants not only went to get my proper size, but he even put the shoe on for me and took it off! Charles and Keith - Service: 10/10. So i thought i had found the perfect shoes to match my dress, no doubt they are incredibly amazing shoes, here have a look;
Yes i know I'm so incredibly amazingly talented at modelling shoes ;) But look at these babies, aren't they just beautiful? They are so comfortable to walk in as well. The heel is quite short, I'm most comfortable in very high heels, its funny because i can't walk in heels that are too short and stumpy. So i really liked these shoes and so did my mum so i might get them when i get back from Australia, or if anyone is feeling kind and generous and wants to get me a random present, those babies up there will do fine, size 38 please. What made me most proud however, was that when i went back to Charles and Keith with my parents, my dad actually picked up a pair of gladiator heels with a full 5 inch heel. My dad, my own FATHER. I have never been more proud of him! The bloody store only had size 40 and above, so thanks a lot God. The one day my own blood father picks up a gladiator shoe out of his own interest, you have no stock available in my own size.
~
I know i shouldn't be thinking of you, after everything you've done to me, that is you ripped my heart out of my very own chest and trampled on it leaving behind a heartless, hollow, human being, me. I thought i convinced myself, i really truly did, when i told myself i was over you, i was over you a long time ago. Heck i even made myself believe i was never into you. Its not true, none of it is true. Lies, they're all lies. I've been suffocating in a tangled mess of my own lies. Reality seems to have just caught up with me and i cant stand the effect you seem to have one me, i just cant take it anymore. That night, that night when it all went down, i said something i didn't mean. I shouldn't have, but can you blame me for not thinking straight? I said i forgave you, but that was the biggest lie ever. I so stupidly believed your words again when you said you were sorry, i believed you when you said you would try to make things better. Lies, lies, lies. How stupid am i? To buy into your lies not once, not twice but three fucking times. Why can't i grow a brain and learn to think for myself. Why? I accidentally fumbled across your text messages on my phone tonight, 3 words never made my heart ache so much. Those three words meant so much to me at one point. Now i don't know what those three words mean anymore.Dear Raad,
I was on the verge of tears tonight for various reasons, missing school, stupid boy troubles. But you came online and you showed me you cared, not that you never did before, you always do which is one of the many reasons why i admire you so much :) I always enjoy speaking to you and you never have to worry about me replacing you with anyone else, nor do you ever have to worry about losing me. I just wanted to say thanks for always being there for me, you really made me smile and you made me have fun tonight. I love you Raad <3
Love Sanam
No comments:
Post a Comment